Tim: “Noticed we’re out of flossers, so I ordered some.”
Me: “Oh, thanks. We’re almost out of toothpaste, too, could you-“
Tim: “Yeah, I ordered that, too.”
Me: “…I just got very turned on.”
Tag: humor
pandemic humor
In my family, we don’t have Dad Jokes, we have Mom Jokes.
Q: Why did the panda bears get sick?
A: There was a panda-emic.
Q: Why did the kids in Never Never Land get sick?
A: There was a Peter Pan-demic.
Q: Why did the cookware get sick?
A: There was a frying pan-demic.
And so on, and so on….
Truth or dare, a short story
Tonight I played Truth or Dare with the kids, but we were all out of raisins, and there are very few other foods I will not eat.
And that is why I’m currently digesting a piece of dog kibble.
Mom, explaining Christmas: Some people believe it’s Christ’s birthday. Do you know who Jesus Christ is?
Ellie: Yeah! That’s what Daddy always says when Atticus is being a brat!