Ten Years (or: How I Met Your Father)

We_re_adorable.

This guy and I have been married for the big ten as of August 17th. We’ve reached the point where he’s been in my life longer than not, and in honor of our 17 years together, I thought I’d write about how we met.

In 1999, we went to the same public boarding school – him from the coast and me from the County, mixed with a bunch of wild and too-smart-for-their-own-good teenagers in the middle of northern Maine.

1918326_704261487229_3122324_n

Tim was incredibly shy and quiet, even more than he is now, and he blended into the background (which is funny, since he’s 6’4″ and built like a football player). I distinctly remember saying “Hi” as we passed in the hall, and the look he gave me reminded me of that scene in Inside Out where alarms are sounding and the kid’s emotions are flailing all over the the place because a girl looked at him.

Anyway, we had a few classes together, but I didn’t notice Tim until we had a night class in our second semester. He was cute, and he usually held the door for me on our way to the dorms after class. It took me the better part of two months to work up the nerve to talk to him.

(And when I say “talk to him”, I mean I pinged him on ICQ with a group message to a bunch of other students on Valentine’s Day with a generic “Happy Valentine’s Day” message. He wasn’t the only shy one.)

Amazingly enough, he took the bait. At the time, he was kinda interested a friend of mine, but the feeling wasn’t mutual. We talked mostly on ICQ, with the occasional “hello” in class, and eventually we started hanging out in person.

We weren’t really a couple, though. There was a lot of back and forth, a lot of working up the courage to ask the right questions. He was hesitant because he’d be going to college in the fall, and it seemed fruitless to start a relationship when we only had a few weeks to get to know each other. At some point, I got tired of the will-we-won’t-we game and decided to move on.

A month or so passed, and then on prom night he messaged me again, to tell me he regretted that he hadn’t asked me to prom, that I’d looked beautiful in my dress, and that he missed me. He was so genuine and sweet, so we started talking again.

10698443_10101965309021819_3646794079288686688_n

On a Friday night shortly thereafter, he called me on the phone (from the lounge in his dorm wing), and we talked non-stop for six hours (and now you know how I got my internet handle!) Despite his soft-spoken nature, he was easy to talk to, and we never ran out of things to say. When we finally hung up at midnight, it was clear we were smitten.

That was the call that seemed to solidify us as A Couple, and in that short span of time, he went from hesitant about our future to full-on, head-over-heels in love, and I followed him down.

He’d tell me he was going to marry me; I’d tell him he was crazy, and that back-and-forth continued for seven years, until I finally (and happily) relented.

14209_10101857555246249_187600293556616868_n

When I think about all the things that could have broken us up in those first years — a year and a half of long distance, sharing tiny, crummy apartments in college, family tensions, school and work stress — I continue to be amazed that two kids from opposite ends of the state who had no clue what they were doing stuck together and made it.

We’ve faced everything together, and thankfully something in our personalities made us grow together rather than apart. I couldn’t name it (luck? good humor? work? love? a combination?), but I know that since we’ve been together, I’ve always felt at home.

There are a lot of challenges ahead in the next ten years. Teenagers! Middle age! Ongoing mental health drama! But we’ll be in it together, whatever comes.

We_kinda_unintentionally_ditched_the_kids_with_Uncle_J_and_Aunt_Julie._This_warrants_a_selfie.

😃+

who let me have children, anyway?

I didn’t write about it at the time, but Tim returned from a business trip to Hungary a couple weeks ago and at the risk of sounding incredibly un-feminist–I’m not entirely sure how I survived that week and a half without my husband.

Let me preface this by saying, I am not single parent material. Period. Tim and I make a great team and he’s an exceptional and involved father. For that I am very grateful, but when he leaves life gets… difficult. Like I’m suddenly missing a large and very valuable limb.

Case in point: Tim went to Montreal for a weekend WordCamp this summer, leaving Ellie and me (a very pregnant me, I might add) to our own devices. My mom came to help for part of the time, but mostly it was just the two of us, hanging out. I thought I was prepared for the chaos. I even dug out my giant childhood sticker collection and let Ellie have at it, thinking that would keep her busy for a while (and obviously forgetting most two-year-olds have the attention span of a gnat on crack.)

Sticker fun lasted about five minutes. Five minutes of peace–that summed up my weekend. Ellie refused to nap, so by the time Sunday evening rolled around she was alternately bouncing off the walls with giddy happiness and throwing herself on the floor in a fantastic tantrum–all in the span of maybe two minutes. At one point Tim Skyped us to see how things were going and, upon answering the video chat, was greeted with two sobbing females–one child, one adult, both at the end of their proverbial ropes. Let’s just say it was intense. I’m surprised he didn’t decide to stay in Canada permanently after that.

So that gives you an idea of how I fare when I parent alone–I’m basically on autopilot, and a pretty crappy autopilot at that. I’m less hormonal these days, sure, but now I have two children to think about–twice the chaos! Half the sleep! Continue reading

😃+

crazy summer

What a crazy summer! When we do things here at casa de Moore, we do them big and we do them all at once. No screwing around.

Tim just picked up a fantastic job with Automattic, the company best known for WordPress and related deliciousness. It’s an amazing opportunity and we’re both a little in shock about the whole thing, in a good way. Tim loves the work he’s doing there, and so far he describes everyone he’s met as “the nicest people ever.” I’m so proud of him! And now whenever I have blog issues I have an official Automattician on hand to help. Win-win. 😉

Ellie started pre-school a couple weeks ago, and that transition is going well. The change of scenery hasn’t slowed her down. If anything, she’s on the go more than ever. I’m not sure what this “energy crisis” is everyone talks about, because energy sure isn’t a problem in our house, at least not for Ellie. Tim affectionately refers to her as “our little warlock”; we’re convinced she’s using some kind of Drain Life spell against us.

And then we’re waiting on baby #2 to make her grand entrance sometime in late August, which means I’m attempting to get all that work stuff and business stuff wrapped up. I would be perfectly happy if she decided to make her appearance earlier rather than later because truth be told, I am very tired of this pregnancy nonsense. Originally I said I’d try to soak up every last moment because there are no plans for more babies… this being our last, I wanted to be more sentimental about it. But right now I am overly hot, tired and uncomfortable and very much looking forward to meeting this kid.

Whose bright idea was it to have a late summer baby, anyway?

(Whenever I ask this question, Tim just glares at me and reminds me of all that whining I did back in October when I was convinced it would take us years to get pregnant again. Hah. Ahahahahaha. Baby fever makes me not so bright.)

I haven’t done much in the way of photos or illustration this summer, which is unfortunate (but not surprising.) Give me a few months postpartum and I’m sure that will change. Actually, I’m kind of bored with my current desktop background, so maybe that’s the motivation I need to doodle something today…

😃+